Well that didn't take very long...

I like the weight lifting/plyometrics in P90X and want to continue to weight lift now, but I MISS endurance sports. It's just a different kind of 'burn'.. not the muscle burn the mental and calorie burn. I miss feeling like I used it all up. You endurance junkies know what I mean. I just can't explain it. I love that feeling like I left it all out there and the following empty need to eat feeling.

I went for a random almost 40 mile ride the other day and it felt GREAT! It was hard.. HILLY! I've mentioned that it's hilly here right! This was the first ride w/ a new friend (well and her friend) and this was Nicole's longest ride to date. We rode from Nicole's house over to meet Monica and by the time we were done w/ the main part of the ride (still needed to ride home) Nicole and I were both pretty used up. We had a MASSIVE long hill to ride up to get back to her house or we could add another 5 miles to our ride and still have hills, but not the big MASSIVE long one. We decided when we were initially done w/ the main ride to do the extra five and skip the big climb because frankly we were worried we wouldn't make it all the way up. Well, we got closer to the hill and Nicole said, "you want to add 5 miles or climb for 5 mins?" We had just come off a nice long downhill (you know the kind where you go like 35 miles an hour w/o working at it) and I was feeling pretty good now (uh since I hadn't used my legs for a few minutes) so I said, "Let's climb!" And we did. We got all the way to the top w/o falling over. And were definitely SPENT by the top. It felt AMAZING!

I was really expecting to barely be able to walk the next day. Weekend warrior syndrome. But I felt FINE! FINE!!!! I couldn't believe it. I did take the day off (aside from 2 hours of mowing.. ugh).

There are a lot of sprint races around here so I'm considering just jumping into a few. I'm working myself up to start swimming in the sound once a week w/ the tri group in Fairfield. It's a haul down there, but I'm going to tag along w/ Nicole. It's worth it to have people to swim with.

We've been doing a lot of yard work lately. Our yard is wild and out of control and every time I mow I day dream about truck loads of mulch. I do want to make more beds around the house and around the perimeter of the yard and have started buying plants here and there to fill in these areas. You could plant hundreds of dollars worth of plants in this yard and would barely notice it's so wild and big. Of course we are used to 'urban' yards that are much smaller.

I'm finally getting around to putting a fence around our piddly little veggie garden. I have potatoes and a few plants that Nicole gave me that need to get in the ground NOW! I'll put some seeds in too to see what happens then might get some starts to put in too. All one big experiment.

My kefir water and milk are going gang busters in this warm weather and I'm getting it in the kids in smoothies.. they won't drink it straight up. I'll have plenty to try some cheese recipes soon. Probiotics are GOOD!!!

Hope everyone is having a great start to summer and for all of those racing.. Good luck. It's starting!!! I'll be out there spectating for sure... and maybe jumping in here and there. I'm going up to Lake Placid w/ dad to volunteer for Ironman on July 25th! Can't wait!

Slowly but surely

IF you can see past my silly outfit ... two coats on my waste and inappropriate pants for a trail run I think you'll see that the P90X is starting to work. :) My shoulders have.. GASP.. are those muscles? :D YEAH! Nothing like seeing progress to keep you moving. Only 1.5 weeks left in this month then I'm onto the last month in the first round. Can't wait for round two. THAT'S WHERE THE MONEY IS!

Mothers Day

I will start this post ( or provide a disclaimer ) that I do like being a mom, but damn!

Mother's Day was not the best this year. I started out going to a race that I felt was largely a waste of my time. More on that later. Then came home to kids that didn't really want much to do w/ me and are in a phase where they whine, back talk and fight almost constantly! UGH. Not ideal for me.. on 'my' day. I wasn't really feeling the Mother's Day vibe all week... see above regarding the behavior of my offspring.

Jason is all up in Lily's grill and Lily is wanting some space. BAD BAD BAD combo. I'm thinking they are also still recovering from our trip to Seattle as sleep - or rather going to sleep - has not been going well around these parts.

The race. The Northface Challenge is always well run and the course was great. I got up at ass crack, had some coffee, hoped for the daily you know before race stuff which didn't happen, then made some breakfast and headed out on my 1 hour and 10 minute drive to the race venue. The drive was nice enough. Parked at the designated parking area to be shuttled over. My race started at 9am and the last shuttle left the parking area at 8:15a. I was early... maybe around 7?45a. Then went and stood around in the FREEZING WINDY cold for over an hour. I had originally planned to stash my outer layer w/ the gear check guys, but didn't bring a bag (thought I'd be able to get one??) and didn't want to stand in line w/ everyone else that waited till the last minute to strip off their stuff so I decided to be "that" dork running in a fleece and long (not meant for running trails) boot leg tights over my intended running gear. SAAWWWEEETT! The race photos should be spectacular ... two coats tied around my waste! ha. If there are even any photos of me bc my number was covered on "accident".

I loved loved loved the descents. I figured out how to use my knees and relax my legs and hop down. Great fun. The run overall was well marked. It never did thin out completely (500+ runners), but it opened up enough to run and i was comforted by other people around w/ my tendency to get lost in the woods. My nutrition held up (I know it's just a 10k, but I was worried about my lack of carbs) I think 10k might be my new favorite.. particularly trail.

Moral of the story for this race is I'm only going to do stuff that's 30 mins away for a while.

I got home and the kids basically watched scooby doo mother's day marathon most of the day. I relaxed, made the kids some bracelets, thought about doing laundry and remembered it was Mother's Day and saved it (reminding myself I need to do it today), researched some stuff while watching Scooby (should have napped), Tom cooked a delicious dinner. Then the kids were sassing me and generally just not listening so bad I couldn't take it anymore. Jason was going to get a hair cut, but I took the clippers (which he insisted on opening himself though Tom and I had both asked him not to) and sent him into his bedtime routine. Both kids baulked at this and wouldn't listen and were continuing to back talk so I put them both in their rooms and told them that was it time for bed. Tom and I then stood outside their rooms and kept walking them back to their beds while they screamed and cried in protest! Jason finally gave up and went to bed so I left Tom to finish up w/ Lily.

So HAPPY FING MOTHER'S day mommy. I will get them to submit! I WILL! ha ha

Then there is just crap on TV on Sundays. Must remember to DVR stuff during the week so I have stuff to watch when I really just want to veg and sit in front of the TV.

On a high note.. a friend turned me onto Kefir and it's many benefits. It's also SO easy to make yourself so I have abandoned any thoughts of brewing my own Kombucha and will be making Kefir. I got some starter and made my first batch using coconut water and milk and it's pretty good. I ordered some 'grains' (have no idea why they are called that. they are actually a culture) to be able to make it over and over and over again. I'm pretty excited. I know I'm a dork.

I'm working on doing some more sewing... though I know I should be focused on finishing my priming and painting in the basement. Those of you that know me personally know that I am very easily distracted and prefer to bounce around a couple of projects to avoid boredom.

P90X is still rocking.... about 50 days in now. Can't wait to start my second round as I think that's when people REALLY start to see results.

The Candida Diet thing (basically meat and veg and fermented dairy) is proving slightly difficult to stay on, but I power through. When I crave something 'sweet' I drink herbal tea or have some raw chocolate made w/ cocoa and coconut oil. NO sweetener. The ultimate dark chocolate. Sometimes I'll put some raw almond butter in it to 'sweeten' it a bit.

Here is hoping for a better day today.... though I have a feeling there will be a lot of room time for the kids. Thank God for preschool.

Gotta say.. not LOVING the twin thing at this stage. Four is better, right? RIGHT? Only one more month until their birthday!

Oh, and I'm headed to Madison this weekend for a quick trip! YEAH!!!

The Northface Challenge

This Sunday for Mother's Day I will be running the Northface Challenge 10K!!! I had registered for the half. I was really pained about this now. I ran a half a few weeks ago and it was tough... and it was on the road. I know the NFC is going to be HARD! Off road is hard enough, but the site says it's HILLY and technical. When I registered it sounded all well and good. Aside from the race being challenging for me at this point bc my running has fallen apart I didn't really think much about the time it would take... on MOTHER'S DAY. Over an hour to get there, I'm guessing 2.5 or more hours to run/walk it, then over an hour to get back. So basically all day. As I considered my mother's day this wasn't how I wanted to spend it. I wanted to spend it w/ my family. so w/ those reasons in mind (mostly the time commitment and the potential for suffering) I emailed to see if I could change to the 10k after a prompt from my Sister in Law and I didn't think it would happen, but I got an email today that I'm switched!!! YEAH! This answers all problems. 4 hours away and I'll be back for late lunch / early dinner and some family fun on Mother's day... AFTER getting some quiet me time in the woods. Perfect!

P90X is going great. I'm at it 100% now and not even a week back in and I can feel it already. Things are getting easier. I'm able to lift heavier and can knock out over 10 push ups (real ones) now. (I know not that much, but way better than when I started.) No pull up yet, but I can tell I'm getting stronger. This is yet another reason I didn't want to run the half marathon and thrash my legs. I don't want to have to skip my leg work out or any of the work outs next week b/c I wrecked myself so bad I couldn't do it.

I took some measurements that I will take again in a month.. then each month. I plan to work through the first 90 day series then do it again through the summer and then might see what I can do about a trainer at the gym to spice it up a bit. (Um... maybe a birthday present to me... :D)

And the belly bloating thing... MUCH better. After my trip to Seattle I started thinking that maybe I really do have a problem w/ Candida. I've thought this in the past, but never acted on it bc i didn't feel empowered to do it myself. I did some research and changed my diet DRASTICALLY. Went from all fruits and veggies to NO SUGAR WHATSOEVER... including fruit. And the difference was night and day.. in just a few short days. I do this for a month (I'm 1.5 weeks in) and then I can start adding fruits/carbs back in and see how my body reacts. While I do this I take herbs to kill the yeast overgrowth... then probiotics to rebuild.

The lucky news for me is that this diet goes along w/ Phase 1 of the P90X diet.

Reality Check One, Two, One, Two

So I've been on the endurance train for a while. I took some pit stops here and there and I know I always feel better when I'm on the train, but seriously. Every time I get race photos back I think to myself, (YES THIS IS TOTALLY VEIN) "really I bust my ass and THIS is what I get?" I work out A LOT people. Run run run run and run some more. Now adding swimming and riding (new in the last three years anyway). And while this has certainly helped my pants size (why do people refer to it as dress size.. I mean really, who wears dresses anymore) my 'physique' is still not where I would like it to be.

I mean sure it could be worse, don't get me wrong most days I feel pretty good about the result, but really... it could be better. A lot better.

As most of you know I have been doing some P90X.. now I say some b/c I haven't done the program all out. I've done the weight sessions only and none of the other stuff... b/c well I've been running and riding and swimming. So each session takes under and hour... YES UNDER an hour. I run for at a minimum of 40 mins to an hour... MINIMUM! And my long runs take 1.5 to 2 hours at a minimum.

Anyway... a lot of you have asked... "is it worth it? Does P90X really work?" Well I would definitely say that I am getting stronger... still no pull up unassisted, but it's early. So here's what I'm committing to my dear readers. I will do the program. I'm going to consider myself 30 days in already... even though I didn't do the first 30 days all out. I don't want to start that round all over again b/c I don't want to get bored. I've done that round (half assed) more than once already.

So I'm going to do the program. I'll take photos. I already took my "30 day photos" which, I'm sorry, but I refuse to post until I have something better to look at. Most of you saw the bikini photos on facebook from when I went to Miami. They look about the same. This is where my original "Reality Check, One, Two, One, Two" came from. I took those photos and when I looked at them I immediately wanted to eat a pint of Ben and Jerry's b/c really. I do all this work, I DON'T Eat Ben and Jerry's and I look like THAT! SHIT! SHIT SHIT!!! It's time to do some work! REALLY!

Yes this post is vein. Am I proud of my athletic achievements?? HELLS YES! Am I proud of the way I look in a bikini.. absolutely NOT! So it's time for me to stop whining about it and drowning myself in imaginary ben and jerry's and start building some metabolism boosting muscle.

And just for you my dear readers... starting after my trip to Seattle I will even haul my lazy ass out of bed before the kids get up and get my P90X in so that I still have time during school hours to run ... b/c let's face it... I need it for my mental fortitude really.

PS. Most of you know I have some issues w/ food. (meaning I can't eat like a normal person b/c well my belly rebels!) so I won't be doing their food program, but based on what I've read / heard it's Paleo like.

The Minis

I realize there hasn't been much of an update on the kiddos. :) LOVE LOVE LOVE the iPhone, but it has caused me to basically quit taking photos w/ our 'real' camera. I dusted it off and took a couple of videos and photos... mostly after going through some old blog posts and really enjoying the old videos.

The kids LOVE to ride their bikes. Jason is on his walking bike here b/c we lost a training wheel in the move.. we finally replaced it, but this was taken before that.


They ride up and down the street together.. racing then waiting for each other. it's so cute. They are best buds.

Baseball is another favorite. Jason has great hand eye coordination. He can it a ball.. he can hit a target throwing a ball. It surprises me every time. Here is a typical session w/ Jason and Lily...

What's up at Che Mount?

Lots of things rolling around in the ol' noggin'... Have that caged animal feeling again.. I come and go w/ this. A good work out should help. Hey, wait.. I had two good work outs over the last three days.

I'm feeling like I don't want to register for races for a while. I just want to do ... whatever. I know I need to run, but I don't really feel like it right now. I'd rather ride my bike... and that's all well and good, but I have another half marathon coming up in three weeks. I should run. Really. I also kinda want to focus more on weights, but as I said after the Danbury 1/2 lifting and running and riding 'some' doesn't prepare you well for an endurance event... So that's what I'm thinking today. We'll see how I feel after some time goes by. I will go to spin class tomorrow. I will lift tomorrow. I will ride my bike on Thursday w/ Tom. I will lift on Thursday. I'll run on Friday and Sunday (we'll see if I can cram something in on Saturday before we head out on our trip) and I'll run next week while we're in Seattle...

And I've made a decision about going back to school. I'm not. 1. it's not the right time for me and 2. I'm not even sure that's the direction I want my life to go. I've got nothing but time. :)

I'm starting to feel like some goals are surfacing in my mind. Will work on getting them on paper.

In the mean time I couldn't be more excited about spending some time in the PNW! I miss Seattle SO much.

Danbury Half Marathon

So I kind of forgot this race was coming up. I didn't really look at the map (I guess I don't normally pay too much attention to that.. I like to be surprised) and I had no idea what the elevation would be like. Though I did suspect it would be hilly b/c, well, it's hilly here. Thank God I've been out there running the hills for the last 5 months (OMG have we really been here for 5 months already?).

I was more nervous than expected before the race started. Thankfully I ran into someone I know from swimming and was able to chat w/ her for a bit to take my mind off the race. I usually spend a fair amount of time on visualization ... none for this race. I thought a little bit last night about what I wanted to put into and get out of this race. Did I want to just run it? Did I want to blow myself up and push the pace as hard as I could.. it is a 'race' after all. I never really gave it my usual amount of mental energy so I guess I inadvertently gave it the 'whatever happens happens' mentality.

I seated myself too close to the front. Or at least I've decided that it's better (mentally, for me) to start a bit more toward the middle so that I can pass some people instead of either 1. get passed or 2. try w/ all my might to hang w/ the speedsters only to have my heart feel like it's going to pound out of my chest. I started out fast and knew I was going too fast but decided to just hang in there and see what happened. The first three miles were sub8... needless to say after those first three were over I was OUT for the sub8 run. :) I knew I wouldn't be able to sustain that pace, but hey, it was fun while it lasted. The first half of the race was relatively flat. At one point around mile 6 or so I passed a guy on a hill and he and I chatted a moment then he said to me, "good luck on the hills." I was all, "yeah you too." not really thinking much of it. Thinking it would be more of the same.. uh, nope. The hills weren't brutally steep (okay a couple of them were) they were mostly rollers... long relentless rollers. The good thing about them being relentless is that every time I thought that word I thought of my good friend Mama Marie. (she once called having twins relentless... so now that word ALWAYS makes me think of her. Love you and miss you Mama Marie!) Thinking of Marie helped get me going. We were die hard work out buddies back in the day. SWOON... How I miss that!

As always there were a couple of ladies I kept my eye on to 'hold on for dear life' to my pace. I passed only one of them. I caught up to one and chatted w/ her for a bit, but she went on to finish a bit in front of me.. seconds?? Minutes?? Not sure.

Around mile 8 a guy in FiveFingers passed me like I was standing still. Around mile 6 my knee had started reporting to me that my shoes are coming to the end of their long run usability and I thought for a moment that maybe I should start easing into the FiveFingers to see how that goes. I am going to hit the running store while in Seattle (as we don't have one anywhere around here) to get some new shoes. I'm excited to have someone watch me run and fit me for some shoes. I've been running in the same style of Asics since I first really got into running back in 1998.. Holy crap.. TWELVE YEARS I've been running. Off and on of course until I had kids. My stride has changed immensely over the last training season (aka winter) so I think it's time to reevaluate some things. I'm still having some trouble w my poor sore toes.

The last half of the race was hard... it went by at a relative pace... I didn't want to die or anything... I'm proud to say that though I considered it a couple of times I DID NOT walk ANY of the hills. I put my head down and ran (okay plodded) up EVERY SINGLE one!

I'm happy w/ my time considering the hills, the fact that I've mostly been lifting and riding and my runs have been subpar. Can't say that AT THIS MOMENT I'm real excited about running another race in 3 weeks... ON TRAILS, but I'm sure I'll feel more excited about it, uh, soon. Northface Challenge here I come!

Now I'm wiped out and could really use a nap, but all you moms know that's just not in the cards. Five more hours until I can go to bed! :D

Still thinking about those goals... tried to go there during the run. Runs are usually good for that stuff, but I feel like there is a PHYSICAL block there not letting my mind think about such things!! Weird! So I plod along in life and take it day by day...

What Race and 3 year brainstorming

So TOMORROW is the Danbury Half Marathon. I feel like it's not even on my radar. So unprepared fro this... just going to run it for fun. I haven't really 'trained' for it per se. I know I can complete it. I was going to go run for 4 miles today, but we had such fun as a family and I didn't want to step away from it knowing I would be gone for 3 hours in the middle of the day tomorrow. I did a little Core Synergistics from P90X and got a sweat on so I called it good.

I really want to focus on my core and get stronger in that department. Which means I must start doing the core work outs huh? :) This week was a good week. Did some P90X Ab Ripper, Core Synergistics and some stuff off YouTube just to mix it up. (the name suggested that I would get a 6 pack if I did it regularly... :D ) So this week I hit my goal of three times a week.

I'm VERY excited to find out that a new friend is into weight training and works out in the early morning. AND she just joined my gym!!!! I so could use some motivation and support from someone that's into weight training. I've seen so many women working the weights at this gym... way more than my last gym. And they look GOOD. Strong, lean women. I love it, but I haven't yet met any of them yet. They get in there and do their workouts before I'm even done slugging it out on the treadmill. AND they look way better than me. HMMM. Who knows what they might be doing outside of the time that I see them, but it's starting to look like I could work out WAY LESS in a DIFFERENT way and get BETTER results. Regardless of the fact that I'm a total endurance junky and need my fix... but it's looking like perhaps I wouldn't have to add THAT much time to my work out allotment for the day/week and I would get good results. So the weight training continues via P90X and hopefully will get kicked up a notch w/ my new buddy. I'm lifting as heavy as I can for now to see what kind of results I can get.. okay so maybe not as heavy as I can for I am limited by the weights I have at home, but heavier than I ever have (in my intermittent past weight training programs). Maybe I'll get crazy and take some photos of myself in a bikini to post LATER w/ my AFTER photos!

In my obsessive blog surfing I found Goals for the Week, and particularly THIS post. As most of you know I really love the new year... looking forward at a blank slate that I can mold to my (well mostly my) liking. Dreaming of all the things I want to do. I was excited to see her process and decided to give it a whirl myself. Fancy new sparkle pen (Lily's new obsession) to make it fun and a blank page. Now 3 year goals. SHIT! I couldn't really come up with anything that I felt was all that exciting or inspiring. HUH? What? Same old stuff getting written down. I decided to walk away from it for a bit. I reread her post and then noticed the word brainstorming and decided that might be a better approach for me than the list. Here is how far I got. "Jason and Lily will turn (GASP) seven and will be in first grade." Stumped. That's it. That's all I wrote.... comes to mind.. the same old same old... be organized, STOP being bloated, move back to the PNW, have a six pack, be able to do proper pull ups and more push ups (I'm up to 10 REAL push ups right now.. thank you very much. I suppose the P90X is starting show dividends.)... and there you have it (okay... Ironman may have been on that list)... that's all I could come up with. I feel like a goal setting loser and failure. I know that is not the point.

I won't give up. I will keep coming back to it until I have something more interesting for myself.....

We are now in the ONE WEEK count down to our trip to Seattle!!!! YEAH!

Bloated...

and SO sick of it! I know I know. Where is the positivity I promised. It's coming. I PROMISE! But in the mean time... I look like I'm 20 weeks pregnant on a good day and by the end of the day it's more like 30! SERIOUSLY! This is so NOT cool!!! I work my ASS off and this is what I get. UGH!

And before you start to give me advice (not that I mind it b/c I don't) I eat a shit ton of fiber and drink buckets of water... and nothing wants to come out the other end. WHY!

I'm sorry. I know this is a lot of info to put out into the ether for the world to see, but I'm just so damn sick of it! It doesn't seem to be diet related b/c I have had this problem for a long time. I was trying to remember the first time it was a really bad problem and the first time that comes to mind it was 2002 I think. I had recently gotten off the pill and I remember standing in the dining room complaining to Tom about it. I only mention the BC thing b/c it helps w/ the time frame and because I suspect this is hormone related. Back then I was basically an eat anything girl... still 'healthy' in my eyes at the time, but wheat (processed / packaged stuff), dairy, meat.. scones (MMM scones.. I miss you) and coffee. And now... well it's the opposite. The only thing from that list that is still on the menu is coffee. :) AND YET ... still have a problem. Can you imagine the amount of fiber that goes in my mouth. FRUITS AND VEGGIES>>>> all day!

Anyway. I'm not sure why I'm sharing this. I guess advice is always welcome. Anyone know if it's okay to drink Smooth Move Tea EVERY FREAKIN day!? Probably not a great idea, but oh how much better I would feel.

I've considered calling the doc, but I know he's just going to want to put a camera where I don't really want a camera. I know this isn't normal.. but what can he do???

Okay... got that off my chest........... I guess I shared it bc I feel it's a huge contributor to my stagnate exercise program..

Yea.. what about that.. I run almost every day too.. and STILL NOTHING! GRR!

Baby Girl

My baby girl is on the web. My dad just called to tell me that Lily was on the Schwinn website. I knew this photo was in print, but didn't know they had it online!

She's FAMOUS! HA HA Check it out HERE.

No time to update right now. Just wanted to share. :D

6.7 miles of hills

My run today was another tough one. I'm really pushing the pace for some reason. It's really strange... it's like my natural turn over/cadence is higher than my heart can keep up w/ now. Thanks speed training. I feel myself just suffering and get frustrated with myself for not being able to have a good strong run then I look down at my Garmin and I'm running sub8s. SERIOUSLY!? What's the matter w/ you SLOW down. So I slow down... only to find myself suffering at sub8 again.

I know I shouldn't be complaining. I worked hard to get some speed, but then I try to run up a hill and implode. My heart rate is already sky rocketing (side note: I finally found my heart rate strap - right where it was supposed to be - not sure how I missed it. So I will be wearing that more to keep tabs on what's up) and then I try to run up an MFer of a hill and just... can't... hold... on. FRUSTRATED.

Hmm.. this here blog is like therapy. Looks like I am doing this to myself. I set out today hoping to have a nice easy 8 mile run and ended up w/ an A$$ kicking 6.7 mile run. I never did find my groove... b/c my heart felt like it was going to explode. Well.. no wonder. I was running sub8s. I'm not sure who or what I'm racing against. I would be lying if I didn't say I didn't want to start posting slower runs ... but damn. I'm entitled to some slow ones right? Ha

I do want to start riding my bike more, but I've gone and registered for a bunch of running races. How much will cycling translate to running. Enough I'm sure. Jesus.. what am I doing to myself. I can CAN go out and run for fun.

I have a half marathon this weekend that I don't feel prepared for. I kinda forgot about it and then was writing out my calendar for April and realized.. oh it's April. I have a race. Then next month another half.. a trail run so I'm just going to go enjoy it... walk the hills if I need to. My limited trail running experience tells me my heart rate will really jack up on trails... so no worries. See some scenery enjoy the C02 from the trees. Enjoy the QUIET!

June brings a sprint tri (I think.. I got in late through a friend and am assuming I'm in... ) and a relay.

I'm still toying w/ the idea of doing a 70.3... I think I could pull it off, but better get my butt on my bike. Which I want to do anyway!

Ramble much?

I want to start posting more regularly, but wanted to be in a more positive place. The more I think about it the more I think it's actually just as beneficial to put the negative out there too. (obviously for me) As I've mentioned more than once it's hard to read all the info that makes it seem like everyone has a 'perfect' life (in many different areas). While I might seem to be some sort of rock star in other people's eyes (though this is hard for me to believe or imagine) it's good for everyone to see that I suffer too.. I have slumps (sometimes long ones) and it's okay if/when they do too. You just have to keep getting on the horse until the kinks get worked out!

I've been discovering lots of cool new blogs and it inspires me to keep this one chugging along. I want to change the name of it... or perhaps I need to start another one and get back to some family blogging. I know some of you would really rather see photos of the kids and hear more about what they are doing and less about how my work outs are going.

Mojo: FOUND

Had a good run today and am working on digging my fingernails deep into my mojo and am hanging on for dear life!!!!

Part of my problem w/ the mojo has been that my digestion is just WRECKED lately. Think horribly bloated ALL THE DAMN time.. I look like I'm about 5 months pregnant by the end of the day.. it's just ridiculous! I've suffered w/ this for a LLLLOOONNNGGG time and it comes and goes in severity. I'm - once again - working to try to eliminate (no pun intended) this problem. It's very frustrating and hard to run w/o discomfort.

Today it wasn't as uncomfortable as other days and I was able to take my mind off of it and onto better things... I think the sun shine helped a lot.

Okay... off to do P90X before I go pick up the kids and rock the yard!

Where oh where is my mojo?

I had such great mojo w/ that winter marathon training (thank God or I never would have gotten through solo winter marathon training)... now it's like pulling teeth to get me to put on my running shoes and head out. My runs have been subpar lately and it makes me less than excited to get out there... I know I just need to get back in the groove and it will all fall together.

Good thing I've got a half marathon NEXT WEEKEND!! UGH! That sure crept up on me. I'm sure it will be fine... no PR, but fine. Trying to get my butt to the gym right now to get a run in. Weather is craptastic here this week and, well, the kid thing. :)

Looking forward to our trip to Seattle in a few weeks... at least I'll get to run w/ some friends! :D

The ability to choose.

Lately I am really trying to decide if going back to school is what I want/need to do. Yes I am into nutrition, but do I want to talk to people all day about it? Nutrition can be highly technical and there are millions of details regarding what all the different elements do to interact w/ all things in your body, but I feel it's really pretty basic. :) EAT WHOLE FOODS! I realize that most people I know eat fairly well so I am sheltered to the fact that most people do not eat well.... but am I the one to help them 'see the light'... I suspect I would be fighting and uphill battle and either be working w/ the infirmed or overweight people looking to shed a few pounds. I suspect that the latter group doesn't necessarily have a problem w/ what to eat as much as they have a problem w/ stepping away from the foods they know are making them overweight/sick. Having experienced a lot of this myself. They typically need a psychologist more than they need a nutritionist.

Lately I'm feeling like I should learn to grow my own food and learn how to sustain our family in a better way (not depending on mass produced products as much) if I really want to 'make a change' and help people.

So the saga continues. I'm slated to start pre-reqs in May... have until then to really decide what direction my life is taking I suppose. What do I want to 'be' when I grow up? Perhaps the answer is to not grow up.

Weighing the pros and cons of it. In the short term I would be taken away from my family, the time I spend running/riding/swimming would be decreased as I focus on my studies..... Long term I would have a masters degree and be employable ...

Decisions decisions decisions.

Jamie Oliver!!!

Jamie Oliver is a British Chef that is standing up for health HERE IN AMERICA!!!! Why does it take a person from another country to bring a call to arms to our health!!??

Jamie has recently been awarded the TED Award. TED, which stands for Technology, Entertainment, Design is a non-profit community of some of the world's most influential "thinkers and do-ers".

Jamie is speaking to my heart in THIS video!! It is his acceptance speech and you MUST LISTEN TO IT!

Jamie is bringing awareness to the state of our country's nutrition. I often feel like I live in a bubble. Most of the people that I know are feeding their families whole foods... good nutrition that they themselves are preparing. I have managed to surround myself by people that take the health and nutrition of their families seriously. As a result of this I forget (and find it so hard to believe) that not everyone approaches their families nutrtion in this fashion.

It's a hard reality that most families turn to fast food... to junk food to sustain (hardly the right word) their families. It breaks my heart to think of this. I can't fathom not feeding my kids the best food I can afford. I want them to have the best start in life... both from a nutrition standpoint and a behaviors (as in exposing them to whole foods ... knowing what's best for them and how to prepare them) that will last a lifetime.

Jamie also points out that the number one killers are not murder and cancer... they are HEALTH RELATED diseases.. obesity, heart disease etc. Things that are PREVENTABLE. Watch the video.. sign the petition! The changes that need to be made need to come from each and every one of us. This is not the schools problems or 'main st' problem alone.. we all need to take a stand and make the change... (Uh, to quote Michael Jackson)...

Let's do this parents...

A day...

My friend JENNIE did a day in the life and I thought it was a cool idea... a pictorial of a snapshot in time! So I did it too! My photos are not nearly as good as hers.

First thing in the a.m. is always a quart of water and my beloved cup of coffee made by Tom. :)


Next up breakfast for the kiddos:


today the boy requested OJ...and spring must be coming b/c I'm composting again.


and me too...


Then the kids watch a show while I clean up (maybe) and get our stuff together to go wherever.. usually the gym or school.



Check schedule/let dog out/get dressed







Now kids dressed... like an olympic event in and of itself.




Off too the gym...
Every time I leave the house I see this. It makes me hopeful that spring will some day get here.


ANNNDDDDD WWWWEEEE'''''RRRRREEEEE Back.

(Jennie mentioned all she does is feed kids and change kids)...

Lunch (have I mentioned lately how much I LOVE my Vitamix?)






Can't ignore the hugely messy kitchen any longer.. first unload the dishwasher (daily..ugh)



Now time to go exercise the dog. Off to Huntington State Park for some outdoors time.
The first thing Jason did was biff it in a huge water puddle necessitating a wardrobe change.


Throwing rocks.


Home again and a little computer time and a snack for Mommy while the kids paint. (jason also snacking... that kid must be growing today alone he ate 1.5 eggs, 2 pieces of bread, a mango, a bowl of oatmeal, about 8oz of smoothie, a bowl or more of snap peas, an apple and two servings of peanut butter, a kashi bar, EIGHT HUGE ravioli)







And of course nature calls. No more diapers, but this sure is fun!


Next up favorite activity... jumping on the bed.


Let's make some playdough ... so you'll have something to do while I make dinner.






(in the interest of REALITY.. though this activity looks all fun and nice there was plenty of "i can't do it" "help me NNNNOOOOWWWW!!!" "lily/jason took xyz from MMMMEEEE!!" during the dinner making/play dough playing party. So don't be fooled by the pretty pics!)

Tom got home a bit late and missed dinner. When he came home the kids were in full throttle run around like crazy people mode.





One last video while I clean the kitchen and throw a load in.


Check out that huge bowl of kitchen scraps headed to the compost. ONE day in the Mount house.. wow! Just started this up again, but will probably save us a bag of garbage a week!!!!


Ready for bed...






2 stories each and some cuddles and they're down for the count.. Lily got up once and she may not be out yet.. she likes to read/color for a while before bed. Jason is out like a light.



Now I'm working on the computer and Tom is checking out beer brewing stuff (just guessing) on his iPhone.

This was fun JENNIE!! Thanks for the idea. By the end of the day Lily was done having her photo taken, but Jason loves it! :D

My church

I had a fantastic spinning class today. Not because of the physical, but because of the mental.



Two songs really got me. Natasha Bedingfields Unwritten. I'm reaching for goals that only I can achieve and this song really spoke to me, but I Run For Life by Melissa Etheridge nearly brought me to my knees.



I run for life.. I run for those that can't.. I run for those that can.. I run because I can! To all of my training partners (real and virtual), to all my friends and loved ones I run for YOU!!!

This song drives home the mission. For those that are fundraising.. THANK YOU!! For those that aren't... donate. I know you know someone that is doing an event w/ Team In Training.. and if you don't I can hook you up!
http://www.blogger.com/img/blank.gif

WHO DO YOU RUN FOR?

Swimming

I had some aha moments in swim last night. Things really feel like they are coming together and things the coach Chris in Madison would tell me are finally clicking. Like, "OH THAT'S what he meant when he told me to do that!", and "OH, that's what that was supposed to feel like!!" Three years later... not too bad. ha ha

I got bumped up to a faster lane last night and man I felt good about that. One of the guys (fyi, the lane was all guys and I kept up WITHOUT flippers) even said, "Go ahead you are faster than me!" REALLY he said that.. out loud. I almost had to shake the water out of my ears to be sure I heard him correctly!

I finally got my elbow position in the right place last night. Oh, this is what the finger tip drill was suppose to teach me!! I also finally started feeling my catch and really feeling like I'm making contact w/ the water and pulling myself through!

I'm actually feeling some power in my stroke. The number of strokes it takes me to get from one end to the other actually went down by TWO strokes from last Wed w/ some minor adjustments last night! This is huge for me. I've been struggling w/ this!

Last night as I was telling Tom about this I was so thankful to have triathlon, running, and swimming. SO thankful that I have a husband that understands and affords me the opportunity to train, practice and race! It felt so good to feel like I was improving at something! Improving at something that I do JUST FOR MYSELF!

To all my mom friends out there.. find your thing. The thing that brings you joy and MAKE MAKE MAKE the time for it. Having something outside of my mom role to really put the time in and excel at is HUGE for my happiness and satisfaction in life! H-U-G-E!

Feel the love!!

I don't know what happened, but for some reason I stopped getting notice of new comments on the blog. I just logged in to post something and saw that I had 57 comments that needed moderated. I really thought NO ONE was reading this thing anymore. Wow! I was wrong. I want to send a shout out (and apology) to everyone that has been commenting in the last month. I'm sorry that I didn't respond to everyone's great comments... particularly on my not so uplifting blog posts! I was in a slump and WOW you guys stepped up to offer support and encouragement and I totally missed it! Thank you from the bottom of my heart!!!! And KEEP IT coming.

Don't worry... I'm not deleting anyone's blogs (Sonja and Kelly)!! :D I love your blogs. You guys push me to be a better athlete and I love that!

Things on the athletic front are up and going up. I just registered for a local 1/2 marathon that I had forgotten was out there. I had the race bug and was thinking.. hmm I need to find something in April and I met a guy in Spin class today and he mentioned the Danbury 1/2! Oh how things happen. I'm trying REALLY hard to practice the 'law of attraction'... I get what I put out there! All things are possible! I have everything I need to accomplish my goals RIGHT HERE AND RIGHT NOW! And then BAM. I put it out there and not 24 hours later it's given to me! AWESOMENESS!!

Swimming seems to really be coming together... I still can't get to the end of the lane w/ less than about 19 strokes (frustrating), but I feel like I'm getting stronger, my stroke is getting better and I'm feeling more confident... and that's a lot. I am looking forward to swim work outs and that's saying even more!

I feel like I'm starting to connect with more people (even if a lot of them aren't in my same geographic area) and that is helping to give me more spunk and confidence as well. Thanks for the GRRRR Sonja! :D I used it in spin class today!

P90X is back on the schedule. I did legs and back yesterday I'm feeling it today.. in a good way. Spin was a struggle for the legs, but my mind was able to overpower the pain! I'm also trying to concentrate more on my core in all things I do. I know I have a weak core and when I am consistent in working on it I definitely feel it - in a good way - in all athletic endeavors.

Thanks again ladies. It means so much to me. I enjoyed reading each and EVERY comment I received!!!!

Mama's back!

Okay so I realize my last post was pretty, uh, negative.

Let's leave that behind. The negativity!

I had a pretty nice slump there after Miami.. Post race blues hit HARD! Post race, post girls weekend, return to the cold and single parenting all in one day does not do well for me!!

I'm happy to report.. I'M OVER IT! I got back on track w/ my diet I pushed through the slump and I'm ready to get at it again!

I'm spinning, swimming and running and day dreaming about when I can take the biking outside. I'm working on finding some friends both local and around New England to ride with. I just met Mandy and found out she is training for a marathon (or two) AND Timberman. She lives in Maine and I hope I can join her for some rides this summer. Check out the local scenery.

I also met another woman that lives in New York (upstate) and she's going to join me for the NorthFace Challenge. She is training for Lake Placid - her first IM and I hope to make it to Ithaca to ride w/ her as well.

It feels good to be back and to be connecting w/ others. This weekend I'm going to a water running clinic w/ the local tri club... connections connections connections.. priming the pump for spring. I know it will come!!!!

Okay off for an adventure to the children's museum with some mom friends!!!

Fing Blogs!

Why do I read so many people's blogs. I really just need to stop the insanity. Seriously. Sometimes I feel all uplifted and I really do like to look into other people's lives - trying to escape mine, voyeuristic?? Who knows?

For the most part they just piss me off. There are the athletic mom type blogs where these women are seemingly kicking ass and taking names in whatever their chosen sport is all while balancing motherhood and sometimes full time jobs with the greatest of ease. They chat about how they ran 7 minute miles in their last long run and won their age group in LIKE EVERY RACE they have done!!!! Their kids are great and their abs are ripped and they have the photos and finish times to prove it.

Then their are the blogs (moms again) w/ beautiful photography of fabulous craft projects they do WITH THEIR KIDS and everyone loves each other, it's all grand and no one yells and the kids go to bed when they are told to go to bed. They all eat yummy home cooked organic food that their kids devour with out complaint. You know the ones...


HRMPH!! Do you think they are REAL? Do you think that life is as it is depicted. I mean yea, the people are real and their lives are real they are blogging about THEIR reality, but do you think my perception is correct?

Where are the screaming banshies that bounce off the walls, complain about EVERYTHING you put in front of them be it food or activities. They want you to play with them, but then when you finally do decide to give it a shot hoping it doesn't bore you into an early grave they tell you YOU AREN'T DOING IT RIGHT! Well shit if I'm going to be bored to an early death AND I can't do it right screw it.. play with your brother/sister. Where are the balls of dog hair finding homes and creating colonies in every corner. Where are the dirty dishes in the sink, the never ending piles of laundry in some state of done and not done, the pajamas that I'm pretty sure I've had on for three days in a row, the cups of coffee, the tv shows while I pretend I care or catch a nap, the clutter that seems to always be here despite my efforts to dispell it?

Where is the piss poor attitude and thinking... uh, I WANTED this? Where's the reality folks... you are making the rest of us feel like shit!

Perhaps I just am not that zen? Perhaps?? You think? I wish oh, wish I could be those ladies. I'm okay in my speed and I'm happy w/ that.. but these ladies are out their racing a ton. I could not keep up with that.... I've tried and not even at their pace. Guess I should just accept that. We are all different, eh? I wish I could sit down and ENJOY doing crafts with my kids, enjoy just playing silly kid games. Eat them up and love every second to include the many tantrums, loud LOUD noises and messes. I need a chill pill.. hmm HAPPY pill? Little "purple" pill.. or is it little "blue" pill. I can't remember..... What I really need is SOME FREAKIN' WARMTH!!! A nice warm day where we can go play and climb and run and scream OUT SIDE!!!! ALL DAY! A park to WALK to would be GREAT! I miss Madison!

Okay... I just had to get that out of my head. Now I'm off to delete almost EVERY ONE of my RSS feeds so I can stop pretending I'm fast, clean, creative or really fit to be a parent! ha ha I'll be buried under a pile of laundry, drinking a cup of coffee in my three day old jammies if you need me. No pretty photographs. There's just no way to pretty that up!

Miami Marathon 1/31/2010

I left it ALL out there! As you know going into the race I was gunning for a Boston Qualifying time of 3:40. As we started the day out the weather was cool (around 70) with a 30% chance of rain. What I didn't know at the time was that it was also damn near 90% humidity. Safe to say I didn't train in that amount of humidity.

That weekend leading up to the race I had some gastrointestinal issues. I will spare you the details, but it was the opposite of what you think of when you think of gastrointestinal issues. Anyway. I felt okay at the start of the race considering that this issue is pretty common for me.

The half and the full started together so Miranda, Ridge, Erin, Betsy and I all started out together. Betsy, Erin and I planned to stay together to try for 3:40, Miranda was running the half and planned to stay w/ us and Ridge was in it to finish it. We started out strong and I felt good. We were all drenched in sweat in the first two miles. The first couple of miles are always a little slower because of the huge crowds. Within the first 3 miles we had set into pace ahead of the pacers (there were two). When the first pacer caught us Erin told me to stay with him while she went to check on Betsy (she was pacing us). I stayed with him, but he started running sub 8 min miles and I thought I was going to die. I heard him say that by mile 10 we should be caught up. I've never done this before so I assumed he knew what he was doing, but with each mile we ticked off at sub 8s I started to fall back a bit more. Erin got back to me around mile 9 or 10 and I told her I was dying and that this guy was running sub-8s. I was pissed that I felt like this and that he was pushing it so hard. She said he was going a bit too fast (per the other pace guy) and that I should relax, slow down a bit, find my pace again and focus on getting my breath under control. She reminded me that I had trained for this and I could do this. So I did that and we settled in and I started to feel a bit better. I can't remember what mile the other pace guy caught up to us, but I know it was only a couple miles later that I started to lose him too. All I wanted was a huge jug of ICE WATER! I knew that I was over heated at that point. I was feeling a bit dizzy/chilled, but managed to keep it together. I continued to hydrate and dump water on my head.

At around 16.75 Erin told me that I needed to make a decision as to whether I was going to pick up and run the pace guy down or face not qualifying for Boston. I was so tapped out. I didn't have any particular pain that I felt like I needed to run through. I just felt like I couldn't keep up. My legs couldn't turn over any faster and I couldn't find a groove where I could breath and keep my heart rate in the right place. I was fatigued.

I told her I would make the decision in a quarter mile. As I thought about it I was reminded of many conversations I've had with Tom - particularly when I was training for a half Ironman and I was always frustrated with my bike speed. He would always ask me why I do this to myself. Hold myself to a standard, make it all about a time or other goal instead of just enjoying myself. This is about having fun. I WAS NOT having fun trying to run that guy down when I was just not feeling good. I decided I was going to find MY pace and run the last 9 miles of this race as MY race. The race that I was given today and stop holding myself to an arbitrary standard. I wanted to have fun and enjoy this.

I could tell that Erin was disappointed, but I couldn't worry about that. She made me reiterate that I was 100% sure I wouldn't be disappointed at the end even if I missed it only by minutes and I assured her that I was sure.

I don't feel like I quit or gave up. I feel like I assessed the situation and made a good decision. I was still going to have an amazing PR even if I slowed down to 10 min miles.

Erin dropped back with another runner that was suffering with a painful hip and I ran on. I ran alone focusing on my breath, stride and each mile marker. I got in MY rhythm and was feeling good. I saw Erin one more time for a bit then she dropped back to check on Betsy.

I again got in my zone. Running alone and just focusing I was able to maintain an 8:45 to 9:05 pace and I was happy with that. In the last 4 to 5 miles my calves were so tight that I was just waiting for one to charlie horse and for me to hit the ground in a writhing fit praying for relief from the pain, but I made it through. I finished around 3:50. (I haven't looked up the official results yet) My last marathon was 4:20 and my first marathon was 4:08... I feel really good about that PR!

I left every last ounce I had out there. Normally at the end of a race I kick on the afterburners and run as hard as I can through the last .2 to 1 mile. This race had taken it all already. I had no afterburner, no kick. Nothing. I just pushed as I had been and got there as fast as my legs would carry me.

I feel really good about the effort I put forth out there and wouldn't change anything about the race... okay maybe the toe thing.

I'm so glad to have had my girlfriends there to run this race with. I appreciate Erin running with me and helping me to 'almost' qualify. She pushed me just enough and knew when I was officially done "chasing it". I loved starting this race together.

Some people have asked me if I will try again. I am too close to it right now. I don't know. I have some serious SERIOUS toe injuries. Think blister on the entire end of your toe and I"m not sure of the outcome for one of my toes. Might permanently loose that sucker. (the nail not the toe) UGH.



After the race we relaxed a bit then ate our way through the day. There was a group from Madison that went (Fleet Feet/Race Day Events) and we all went to dinner as a group then went out dancing... FYI this is a great recovery strategy. Drinks and dancing late into the night. (which I swore I wouldn't do then did anyway)

It was a great trip! I needed it and I feel better. As you know running long/racing always brings out a lot of emotions and maybe even realizations. I've talked about the physical parts and will delve into the emotional at another time. This is long and I'm tired.

Miami Bound

And we're off to the races. I head to Miami tomorrow and I can't wait. I so need this break and hopefully I'll be able to get my head on straight in the days leading up to race day.

Think of me on Sunday starting bright and early!!!!

I fell into the parental black hole!!!

Tell me you know what I'm talking about. The downward spiral that sends you reeling and unable to climb back out. All is wrong. 1. your kid(s) is/are nuts. Psycho temper tantrums, you can't do a damn thing right. Everything you try to do starts a big whinefest. Today the whinefest began over a particular spoon and went on for a good hour. 2. it all builds up on you and start to react/respond poorly and soon you see everything that they are doing as WRONG WRONG WRONG... hhhmmm. Who's mirroring who here? We did this back and forth all day. By the time I dropped the kids off at school at 12:30pm I was spent! I nearly started crying when I asked their teacher if my kid was acting out in her class too.. she, of course, said no. Great.. they reserve only their best for me. Thanks for that. I was relieved to hear that all was well at school.

I wanted to crawl in a hole and die most of the last two days. Parenting is hard. Thankless and at times (let's face it) largely unrewarding. I found that place today where even the sweet little "I love you mommy's" didn't snap me out of my depressed angry rage. I would just say, "thanks, love you too." w/ barely any emotion at all.

My mom has always told me that she didn't like me until I was about 10 years old. I always thought that was pretty awful, but now I get it. Mom.. I TOTALLY get it.

Tomorrow we are going to have a 'play' day. I will spend all my time (aside from essential tasks like, uh, going to the bathroom and preparing meals - not at the same time) playing w/ the kids.

When it comes down to it I'm afraid the behavior has little to do w/ the kid(s) and a lot to do w/ the amount of time (or lack thereof) I am spending really engaging w/ them.

Okay ... time to get my head out of my ass and start getting on the floor w/ my kids. The dishes, laundry, sweeping, cleaning, blogging, emailing, internet surfing... so forth and so on will always be there. My sweet little kids (who are quickly moving to the dark side as a result of my lack of attention) will not.

I see the light outside of the dark hole.. must move toward the light. And on that note. It's time to put away the last of the dinner dishes and go put my dears to bed. Who are happily playing w/ their dad... far away from their ogre of a mother!

Lara Bar give away at inTraining

Another great deal brought to you by Laura!!!

Another blog I frequent is doing a LARABAR giveaway.. now you know I love me some LARABARS!!!! I would go on about them, but she does such a good job I don't think it's necessary!

You can check it out at inTraining. If you win you have to share at least ONE w/ me! ha ha

Enjoy!!!

If you want a new suit check THIS OUT!

How cool is this suit!? I just love it, but I bet this won't be the one I get!

I found a link to Splish Suits on Run Faster Mommy! and discovered they were having a grab bag sale! $20 for a polyester suit!!! So I rolled the dice and ordered two! One one piece and one two piece. I'll post what I get. Hopefully they are cute!!!!

Just wanted to share this opportunity. I've never used a Splish suit, but all things I read were good! So if you need a little motivation to get in the pool check it out. A new suit always helps me. Okay I've only ever purchased two suits... which is why I need another. One of my suits really needs to be retired!!

Last week before Miami. I'm trying really hard to visualize myself qualifying for Boston. Running through any pain and flying to that finish line with a big smile on my face. Unfortunately so far mostly I've just had bad dreams about not being able to get the job done. Hopefully that's not a premonition.

I am really READY to go to Miami and get some sun shine and girl time. This momma needs a break!

Flippers!!!

I think I found the answer to my swimming woes! I love swimming now.. WITH FLIPPERS! I don't swim the whole workout w/ flippers, but swimming w/ flippers does two things. 1. it gives me confidence b/c I'm not the SLOWEST swimmer in the world w/ them and 2. it gives me the ability to focus on my arms and technique w/o all the high cardio I get from trying to kick and the negative (I'M THE SLOWEST SWIMMER IN THE WORLD) talk.

I'm getting some good feedback from the swim coach and it seems to finally be sinking in because REALLY it's the same stuff that Coach Chris has been telling me for years. I swear it's the flippers allowing me to think and concentrate more! There is hope that I can be the second to last slowest swimmer in the world!

I completed 2800 yards yesterday. I can't believe it! That kind of yardage is unheard of in my swim world. Not in 1hour and 15 mins anyway. I'm happy with that ... even if I cheated and used flippers. I'll take what I can get now.

I took my first spin class at the new gym yesterday too. The lady got right to it and left me begging for cool down so despite the fact that their bikes are kinda ghetto and I really missed my spinning buddy Marie it was a good ride and I was SO GLAD to not be running! Tri season is upon us folks. Time to mix it up.

I also registered for The North Face Challenge 13.1 in Bear Mountain, NY. 13.1 miles of trails on May 9th. Anyone care to join me?

training coming to an end.. FINALLY!!

Things are a brewin' in my mind. I go back and forth. I feel kinda crazy. I've had a rough (am having) taper. My last hard week of training knocked me on my ass. I had all of these grand plans for 2010. I was basically planning on coming out swinging and kicking this year's ass. I was feeling so damn good during my Miami training that I figured.. why the hell not.

Then I got my ass handed to me. The wheels fell off and since then I have been re-evaluating some things. I've been reading a lot of blogs (uh, I'm bored and lacking personal connection) of women triathletes.. CRAZY athletes. Good talented kicking ass triathletes. Women I couldn't even touch if competing against them. I wanted to be them. They are kicking ass and taking names, they are moms, they are in my age group!!! If they can do it ... damn it all I can do it.

Then "the" week happened and reality came crashing down on me. Oh yes, not 6 months ago I was having trouble w/ my energy levels. Not 6 months ago I was seeking help from a doctor to get me back out there. Not 6 months ago I was ready to wave the white flag. Okay.. perspective. I'm crashing again.. at least that's what it feels like.

My body was screaming at my mind... RE-EVALUATE.

My knee jerk reaction was to pull way back! No 70.3, no long trail runs. Maybe no triathlon.. AGAIN this year!

Then I read THIS post ... this lady is a kick ass athlete. I could only dream of being as fast as her. As determined as her.. as successful as her. Wait. Did she just say she was going to do the sport for the love of it and not for the PR of it? Shit, I can do that... right? I can get out there and train around my schedule. Not be a slave to it... right? Isn't that what it's all about? Can I? Can I have a schedule and not follow it to the letter EVERY BLESSED DAY! Can I do that and not feel like a total failure? Can I??? IF I'm going to do a 70.3 this year I must do it that way. I must put my kids first, my health first. I must rest when my body says rest. I must skip a workout when life doesn't allow me to get it in and feel okay w/ it.

So let's see folks. Can I? I have some time to figure it out.

When it comes down to it... I won't be a rock star this year, but maybe I'll get myself out there!! Today is registration for the North Face Challenge... so we know I'll be doing that in May. It's a start!

I will make final decisions after I get back from Miami on the rest of it. Can't wait for some warmth, sun and girl time!

Happiness

Thanks TriMommy for tagging me to make a list of 10 things that make me happy. You must have known I needed to focus on that today!

1. My kids telling me they love me - randomly and w/o prompting
2. Freedom (via my husband) to go out and work out or go out w/ my friends
3. A good drenching hard workout
4. The resulting hunger from said workout
5. My morning americano - also provided by my husband EVERY Morning!
6. My iPhone.. yes, love that thing!
7. Silence.
8. email - I love getting email.
9. a hot shower. Long, hot and uninterrupted.
10. Did I already mention a good cup of coffee. Love a nice bold cup of coffee.

Let's keep it simple!

Now I'm supposed to tag 10 blog friends to do the same:
Jennie - The Perry's of West Seattle
Karen - pdx Mounts
Julie - The Sweet Life (or should I be tagging Todd?)
Todd - The Sweet Life
Karen P - The Golden(ing) Children
Katie - Thirty Something Motherhood
Gena - The Slowest Triathlete
Steph - The Life and Times of the Lamm Fam
Marie - Brownbuilt
Amy - Take Two Please

On that note I have been re-evaluating my goals for 2010 and I think I'm going to dumb it down a bit. I've loved this marathon training, but I'm not ready to continue this level through out the year. I've decided to do shorter tris instead of going for the half ironman distance this year. I want to keep it simple. I'm going to be starting a masters program and I'm not sure what kind of time commitment (stress) that will add and I don't want to overload the family. My job fist and foremost is to keep this house going and give my kids my best. i have the rest of my life to do 70.3s and Ironman races... after I'm done w/ school and the kids are in school.

I know after this training session that I can get a butt kicking workout in a short amount of time. Before I always felt like the shorter runs were beneficial, but I did like them as much as the longer ones because I didn't feel like I had really pushed it... well, I hadn't. Now I know I can get that 'worked over' feeling w/ a lesser time commitment. So this year I will try to get faster at shorter distances... until fall when I'll be running the Portland Marathon w/ some friends.... Jennie, Julie, Karen.. Karen P?

I'm feeling a bit better after an extra day off and am looking forward to a short run (12miles) outside tomorrow.

The wheels fell off the bus!

The wheels fell off the bus!

Where oh where did my energy and motivation go? I was doing SO well! I was cruising along and loving life. Running and loving it! Now, ugh. I want to go to bed!!! I gave myself an extra day off this week to no avail. I got through my run yesterday and it was fine, but I'm lacking the mental stamina and determination to get through it and I'm far from excited about it. I'm HOPING HOPING HOPING this is part of the normal process. I've been training hard and now my body is kind of revolting... just in time for taper. I'm trying really hard to avoid my previous INSTAtaper where I pretty much stop running right before the race....

My BQ dreams are feeling unachievable right now. Again, hoping it's just mental. I know I need to maintain a positive outlook and trust the training I've done. I think I can, I think I can, but first I think I need to nap!

Need some training inspiration?

I've been searching around triathlon blogs and fell upon Sonja Wieck's blog. My first thought was.. wow I want to be her when I grow up. As I blog stalk and read it all she is an animal. She works hard and is truly inspirational. I just wanted to give her a shout out and share the enthusiasm.

Check her out HERE!

Last big week.. Kicking my ...

So I made a big mistake and ate dark DARK chocolate around 8:30pm last night. This caused me to toss and turn till .. I have no idea when, but it wasn't comfortable. Heart pounding mind spinning.. just wishing I would fall asleep. Of course we still have at least one kid come to our bed every night.. yes STILL! So my sleep SUCKED and I felt LESS than rested when I woke up. I was not at all excited about going to do my speed work out .. on the dreadmill. I was so frustrated with myself because I caused this lack of energy.. damn chocolate. This is the first time this entire training session that I've really dreaded a work out so I guess I should just be happy about that.

I dragged myself (and the kids) to the gym and slugged it out. I managed to do 8x800 at 7:30. I wanted to do 7:20s, but it just wasn't going to happen. I did a 400 running slowly between each 800 and walked the 400 at the halfway point. I was reminded by one of my WI training 'partners' that this sort of work out was mental.. that I could do it and that it was good mental training for race day.. It's going to be hard, but I'm not going to quit. So I just kept making myself focus on that. And I wore my Lk Stevens 70.3 shirt so I could see that mDot staring back at me in my reflection to remind myself that this is just the beginning of my season. I have many fun things ahead... to include another shot at the 70.3.

I was SO wiped out after this workout that I put a video in and snoozed on the couch (w/ two toddlers climbing on me) while they watched tv... then had a cup of coffee when I got up.

I felt much better after the nap and half caff coffee. Then it was make dinner then off to the Bethel Tri Club meeting. I stayed for an hour to chat some people up and find out where folks are racing this year. It's looking like I might be doing The Timberman in New Hampshire in August and will do the Rev3 Oly to get my feet wet in the sport again since it's been a long while since I last raced. I'd rather go race where some team mates are going to be than do it all by myself. Besides I've never been to New Hampshire and Tom and I want to see as much as the New England states as we can before we - eventually - return to the PNW.

After my quick jaunt at the meeting I beat feet to swimming. I SWAM 2700 yards. TWENTY SEVEN HUNDRED. Granted it was mostly w/ flippers and there was quite a bit of kicking (which is great after an ass kicking speed work out), but DAMN!!! I worked for it too! The surprising thing is that I WANTED to go to swimming. I didn't have to drag myself there kicking and screaming the whole way. I willing went and jumped right in and swam swam swam. I got some great pointers from the coach and am hopeful that things will come along in the next 3 months!

Okay... off to bed. Please God let me get a good nights rest. (I left the rest of the chocolate in the freezer!)

5 more miles on the dreadmill

Did another treadmill run today. Only 5 miles, but damn it was hard. Why did I think lifting heavy on the legs on Sunday was a good idea? I was thinking..wow my legs feel really good. I need to get a weight set in on them this week so I should do it now and they should be all good by the weekend. Guess I should have done lighter weights. They did NOT want to run today, but I made them. After the first mile I was fine.. warmed up, but still had to force myself to slug out the 5 miles. Done... now 8x800 on the treadmill tomorrow. Good times. That will hurt more I bet!

Looking forward to a glorious day off on Thursday!

My friend Ridge mentioned that she doesn't sleep well during IM training... well I can understand that well. After my big day yesterday I didn't sleep well at all. Hopefully tonight will be different.

The last big week before Miami

I'm in the midst of my last big week before the Miami Marathon. So far so good. Mom and dad left (as Marie put it... my SAG wagon has left the building) so it's going to be A LOT of treadmill running for me! Hopefully not the 20, but probably all the week day runs. I would be outside running on this gloriously crip and sunny afternoon if I wasn't waiting for the inspection guy to come look at my furnace. Why did I schedule this while the kids were in school? Damn it! Guess we'll be hitting the treadmill after school! I'm feeling good again.. though I definitely over did it yesterday w/ P90X, 10 mile run then my first swim session in over a year... I'm feeling it. My legs are also wrecked from some heavy weight training on Sunday. It's all good. Shorty easy run today and then TRACK workout ... on the mill on Wed and a nice day off on Thursday.

Swimming went so much better than I thought it would. The big bonus was that we got to use flippers!!! The coaches theory is that you need to master the technique before you put the legs in play. I'm down w/ that! It's hard to work technique when you are just trying to keep moving forward. We did do some pulling too so it's not all lost. The good news is my shoulders aren't screaming today so I didn't drag myself along using my shoulder muscles. Got some back in there! I like the group and the coach was helpful. Two days a week for the next 12 weeks then ... ???

Tri training officially begins in a few weeks, but I won't be getting on the trainer until after Miami... I'll have plenty of time to reintroduce my cheeks to the 'butt callous".

Off to try to be productive while the kiddos are gone!