12/1/05 - 9 weeks

Last night I discovered that I’m a bit more concerned with Tom’s mortality these days. I couldn’t find him last night. It was about 6:30pm and he wasn’t home from work yet. I had called his office number at 5:45pm and he hadn’t answered so I assumed he was on his way home – on his bike in the dark, but when 6:30pm rolled around and he still wasn’t home I got worried so I called his cell phone – no answer. Okay… he could be on his bike and unable to hear his phone. I called his office phone again. Nothing. I called his cell again and he answered. I asked where he was he said the office. I said it’s 6:30pm, he said, I’m in a meeting. Fine and I hung up. At least he was okay. I found myself wondering what I would do if he was gone! Here I am in a city where I know no one pregnant with twins. Then I started to wonder if the twins would survive through the stress and mourning. They HAVE to survive. Then I thought… okay I couldn’t stay here – though the house would take forever to sell. Would I go to Houston or Seattle. Seattle is more like my home, but I would think I would want to be by family for support and help with the pregnancy and the babies. Great… now I’m a drama queen on top of everything. Tom came home just fine and I asked him to tell me in the future when he is going to be late.