So sad and first night w/o Tom

So sad… I started to pack up Jmans 0-3 month clothes. My little 6 lber has outgrown them.. especially w/ his big boy diaper on! He’s not even 3 months yet. I know, he’s close. Lily is getting close, but she’s only outgrowing the length. So who’s having the next boy??? I’ve already started a little care package for you… will it be Karen P??? Will it be Julie?? Will it be Jennie???

Last night was the first night that Tom was away! My mom stayed the night to help out. 7:30pm rolled around and the babies were acting tired – normally Tom and I would sling them from dinner time to bed time so they are usually sleeping at this hour. Mom had run home to grab her over night stuff so I decided to just see if they would either go to bed for the night or at least nap until around 9pm. I took them up a bit drowsy and put them in their crib. I proceeded to try to rock them or bounce them or whatever them to sleep. They WERE NOT having it and were both screaming so I would hold one .. put it down and pick up the other.. back and forth as they cried, settled, cried, settled. And damn if Lily’s scream couldn’t wake the dead. I ended up having to take a break outside b/c they were driving me crazy and I couldn’t make them stop crying. I came back inside and, yep, still crying. So I threw in the towel and took them in my room. I laid w/ them for a bit until .. yes.. they started crying AGAIN. So I got set up so I could rock them both… see if I can describe. Lily on a pillow on my legs w/ my legs Indian style and bouncing while I hold Jason in my arms. This gets them calmed down, but I can’t move and it becomes most uncomfortable. They fell asleep so I moved them so we could all lay down. That lasted about 10 seconds. My mom came back and we rocked them to sleep and put them in their cribs. I laid down for bed at 9:50pm.. At 9:55pm Jason started to cry so I went and got him to side nurse him to sleep. No sooner did I get settled and he was dozing that Lily started to cry. By this time it was around 10:30pm and at he 2 hours since the last nursing mark… so I nursed them. I thought okay, well this is our normal-ish nurse/bed time so hopefully they will just go to sleep. (also they are well past the “babies should only be up for 2 hours” mark). NOPE!!! They were wide awake. So I left the light on dim and just laid down to go to sleep. I think I dozed a bit before they started to cry AGAIN. God help me if I throw these babies out the damn window!!!! I had had it.. I’d be in at this for HOURS! What the hell is wrong w/ these kids!!!??? It’s BED TIME GO TO SLEEP ALREADY! I threw my hands up and was just sitting there watching them cry when my mom came in. Lily finally fell asleep and mom rocked Jason to sleep in a matter of minutes and when SHE put him down he stayed asleep!!! Little fauker!!!

So anyway.. it was 11:55pm at this time. My FIVE hour endeavor to put these kids to bed.. and it ends w/ my MOM finally doing it. Shit… thank God she’s here.