WANT TO BE MORE!

I want to be better. I want to provide more to you, my readers, to my family and to my friends. I want to go beyond the drivel I put up here in blogger land... and upon reading some old posts ... the belly aching. OH MY GOD!!! I tell my kids not to whine. I think they learned it from me... Holy HELL batman. Strike me dead with lightning I am the CAUSE of the problem. Crap, I digress.... (and start w/ my blathering and whining again.)

I feel like time has gone by and while I'm sure things have changed... they are much the same.

I want to write epic shit, I want to do epic shit, I want to be 100% satisfied with where I am and who I am, but frankly I'm scared. How can I be scared of being the best I can be? Of putting myself out there. Of providing value!?

How? I'll tell you how. I worry that I CAN'T do it. That I can't write epic shit or even do epic shit. That I can't provide value. That I can't break out of the mundane that has become my existence. While I realize the ridiculousness of these statements... surely I provide value... to someone.

What if I put it out there that I want to do these things... I get through a few epic things/thoughts/ideas that I'm actually able to successfully share. That actually motivate and inspire people... and then .....

Crickets!

What if after that the well runs dry..... the blog dies? I die? 

Surely not.

My heart will still beat...

Your heart will still beat...

And I guess I could just go back to writing like I do now.... 

Right? 

So I said it. I put it out there. Next year I hope to BE more... to PROVIDE more...

It's almost 2012 people. ALMOST!